i recently tried to get help because i cry a lot about my dogs (i lost 7 dogs at the same time and it makes me want to scoop my eyeballs out with spoons), i want to top myself and i hate the human race, im also slightly autistic in some way (undiagnosed because i keep getting abused) and hyper-sensitive to noise. im just generally mental i suppose you could call it. luckily help was at hand from PIP!
in the first line of the ten pages i wrote explaining my problems it says ‘ every time i ask for help i keep getting abused’ – and unfortunately this was no different. here’s the recording of me going to get help. after i spent 3 days writing up a report of my lifes problems which could be summarised in an hour (lol) i asked them to come over to my house to see the soundproofing i built around my bed so i could show them i am hyper-sensitive to noise. i said i got anxious about things as well and generally didnt go out, they said they didnt care and they wouldnt come. ok fine. in order to make the appointment i had to stay up because i was so anxious about it. i sat and waited 11 hours watching shit on tv waiting for the appointment time, by the time it came i was knackered. took the 45 min bus ride, spending 50% of my net worth on that lol and when i arrived half hour early thinking i would have plenty of time for everything they said they would be able to do the appointment for 30-45 minutes after the allotted time ie 1 hour 15. i sat there for an hour then asked – whats going on. well, you can hear the rest. i was abused, shown no compassion whatsoever, was not even asked what my problems were, and then because i got the negligence on tape and informed them they looked angry and told me that its illegal. i phoned the police and asked them, they said its fine, its not illegal its a civil matter if the person doesnt like the recording being released. so whoever these people are – sue me if you dont like it – by the time you do it will already be plastered all over the internet and ive sent it out to everyone i know and twitter. so far its received over 1000 RT’s, many outraged comments from people and I have heard from so many people in the same position.
this whole thing was a big deal for me and many other people asking for help.
the DWP are deliberately lying about whether it is legal to record an assessment and thats quite apart from the abject lack of compassion and negligence. when confronted with this on the phone (not recorded) they continued to assert it was illegal, despite me saying i just got off the phone asking the police about it.
im going to go with what the police told me at 13.29 on the 26th of October 2018 as the most accurate piece of information out of the two which seems reasonable to me.
here is the recording of the actual assessment:
IT IS NOT OK TO DOWNLOAD THIS!!! – this is personal enough as it is so here it stays nowhere else please ta
im still trying to figure out what i actually got thrown out for.
one person says i am confrontational, you can hear it and make up your own mind as to whether my calm questions are such. (that person was not present for the 2 minute interview and based her assessment on me asking how long its going to be before someone sees me after missing their appointment time by an hour)
the other person says its the way i ‘presented’ myself. (that person was not present for the 2 minute interview)
in the one place you might think you could let your anxiety actually out because you are with a supposed professional – nope! youre not allowed to be mentally ill in a centre to assess mental illness. i knew it was bad but this is a whole nother level. i dont know perhaps its not the best idea when people ask for qualifications to threaten the police if they dont get out? the only thing i can think of is they were trying to get me out because they were behind schedule as mad as it sounds, or perhaps there is some secret directive ala the recent universal credit whistleblower.
at no point did anyone ask me what was the matter with me :(
i want to thank the pip consultation centre for the wonderful experience of trying not to cry in front of all the old people on the 45 minute bus journey home.
you wonder how the hell they are equipped to deal with psychotic people who properly kick off if they start to freak out over my perfectly reasonable questions. tbh they sounded more mentally ill than me on the tape.
the first paragraph of the semi-prophetic clump of paper i had in my pocket while the audio was running. I made it for PIP and its a 10 page long ‘report’ that details what problems i have which i now realise they were completely uninterested in. oops got political at the end!